“It’s [old age] not a surprise, we knew it was coming – make the most of it. So you may not be as fast on your feet, and the image in your mirror may be a little disappointing, but if you are still functioning and not in pain, gratitude should be the name of the game.” ~ Betty White
Back in the 70’s I purchased the “Visible Woman” for the girls in my high school English class. It was a see-thru plastic model of the human body. I figured that they should know what went where in their bodies. Little did I realize that 40 years later I would be proclaimed an INVISIBLE one.
At least that’s what the Huffington Post, http://www.huffingtonpost.com/ann-brenoff/older-women-feeling-invisible_b_5043467.html, NY Times and everyone else says about women over 50. Apparently, we have become such non-persons that young folks don’t even SEE us.
So, here are some tips on how to make your self more VISIBLE:
- Wear bright colors. No, not just a colorful scarf. I’m talking, red shirt, green sunglasses and bold leggings.
- Talk to ANYONE younger than you. (At this point you have a large pool to draw from). This works particularly well at Starbucks. Find the youngest dodo head with earplugs in and say, “Hi. Whatcha listening to?” If it’s Radiohead, say something hip like, ‘They’re dope.’
- Have something current to say! Like, ‘Hey, did you know there is an ingredient in tree leaves that keep female mice from gaining weight—but it has NO effect whatsoever on male mice?
- Stand by the condiments. When someone sprinkles cinnamon on their latte, say, “Hey, did you know the FDA allows 22 rodent hairs and 400 insect parts in every 100 mg of that stuff you’re sprinkling on your latte?’
- Sit near a group of people talking and eavesdrop. Last week I learned what a “bot” is.
- At the grocery store, fill a cart with a few things, then find several yards of open space, get a running start and hop on. This will cause a few giggles.
- When you’re paying and the card reader says, “Is this amount correct?” Hit the “No” button. When the cashier freaks, calmly explain that in your day a loaf of bread, half-gallon of milk and carton of eggs could be had for $2, not $15.80.
- Head to the mall for a good, brisk walk. As you pass teenagers with too tight, or falling down jeans, begin singing, “My Favorite Things.” Make up your own lyrics like, “Girls in tight leggings with nose rings all jingling.”
Look. We have nothing left to prove! Pythagoras already did that. Be bold. Be brave. Be YOU! The best thing about aging is the FREEDOM to not care about the ‘impression’ you make. You’ve already made it!!
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